The jeans I want cost between $800 and $1,000 unadorned. But where is the fun in "unadorned"? The designers at APO typically use some hard-to-find, hand-dyed raw denim that has absolutely no stretch. Hey, if you need stretch in your jeans, lay off the macaroni and cheese for a while. I also get to specify the buttons, rivet size, and color I want; if I asked for genuine silver, 14-carat gold, platinum and diamond buttons and rivets, I could have them. Even if I wanted 24-carat gold-plated buttons, I could have them. This is going to be great; designer jeans that are truly all my own.
APO jeans are marketed to sports, entertainment, and business professionals, as well as the rest of us rich folks who require elegant pairs of "perfect-fit" jeans. And let's talk zippers. (Yeah, right, like I sew!) Unlike other people's ordinary jeans zippers, the zipper on my jeans will be specially polished and plated. I can't wait to see the pockets—APO lines them with exotic silk rather than the cotton commonly used by other companies. They will be sewn and finished using a secret technique that the company developed and won't share with any other manufacturer. Finally, and I really like this part, the label on my jeans will be personalized with my name and ID number—proof that they are truly one-of-a-kind and made only for me!
All APO jeans come with an authenticity number and are appraised by a top jeweler in the New York diamond district. Currently, APO offers men's and ladies' jeans adorned with silver buttons and rivets for $1,000, 14-carat white or yellow gold buttons and rivets for $1,500, or platinum buttons and rivets for $3,250. Jeans with diamond buttons and rivets start at $4,000. Guess which ones I'm going for?
